PERPLEXING SIGNS

Driving along you’re likely to encounter a variety of roadside signs offering information and instruction designed to help ensure safe passage. Most are clear enough and readily understood. Some, on the other hand, are a trifle baffling, leaving motorists occasionally puzzled and wondering what authorities had in mind. Some of these initial reactions; collected below, suggest why not all of these dis­plays speak for themselves.

THICKLY SETTLED:

Could we be entering Calcutta? Are swarms of people about to descend upon us?

DEER CROSSING NEXT TWO MILES:

Can deer read this sign? Have they been trained or instructed to confine themselves to this stretch of road?

FALLING ROCK ZONE:

Are we talking avalanche or an occasional chunk or two? What about their likely size and weight? Who do we sue?

LET ‘EM WORK/LET ‘EM LIVE

(Signs posted along Connecticut roads—2002)

Remember, if you hit a highway worker the repair work won’t get done. Be merciful.

NO STOPPING:

There can be no standing still in American society: to stop is to be satisfied, to settle, to compromise and not reach our fullest poten­tial. So keep on truckin’.

LOW FLYING PLANES:

What are we supposed to do? Crouch down in our seats so that these aircraft can cruise at ground level?

NO SHOULDER:

You don’t realize you miss them until they’re not there. And where, in the event of a breakdown, should we go?

BRIDGE FREEZES BEFORE ROADWAY:

Why can’t they both freeze together?  Is this sign of any value in the summer months?

SPEED ZONE AHEAD:

Are we expected to speed up or slow down?

HIGHWAY ENDS:

How can that be? We’ve not arrived at our destination?